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This is a transcribed copy for the episode "Pirates." Feel free to edit or add to this page as long as the information comes directly from the episode. |
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UK Dub[]
Mr. Men and Little Miss: The Mr. Men, The Mr. Men, The Mr. Men, The Mr. Men!
(Scene swaps to Mr. Tickle tickling lots of Mr. Men and Little Misses and goes all the way to Mr. Bump and Miss Whoops on a plane and tickles Miss Whoops causing Mr. Bump to fall into the "O" in the logo)
Mr. Bump: The Mr. Men Show!
(A big brown screen comes up with "Pirates" written on it, Little Miss Bossy dressed like a pirate, two anchors, and who created the episode underneath)
Miss Scary (voiceover): Oye matey!
(A cannon ball being fired and a splashing sound are heard)
Miss Scary (voiceover): Ah arrgh!
(The episode begins with a seagull landing on a pier and Mr. Small and Mr. Nosey on a canoe trying to get away from a shark)
Mr. Nosey: (breathing in deeply)
Narrator: For as long as their have been kind hearted Mr. Men and Little Misses...
(The scene cuts to Mr. Happy and Mr. Bump sailing on an old school ship)
Narrator: ...sailing upon the Dillydale seas...
(Through a telescope, we see Mr. Quiet also looking through a telescope. As both telescopes look at each other, we see that the first telescope was being looked through by Little Miss Naughty. Little Miss Naughty is on another ship wearing in pirate clothes)
Narrator: ...there have also been...
(Little Miss Naughty takes out a sword)
Narrator: ...pirates!
Miss Naughty: A-harg!
(Little Miss Naughty and Little Miss Scary (who is also dressed like a pirate) swing on the ropes from their ship and board Mr. Happy's ship. Mr. Bump is the first to take notice)
Narrator: Pirates, who are always up to no good!
Mr. Bump: Huh?
(Mr. Bump takes out his sword and prepares to duel the two pirate lassies)
Mr. Bump: A-ha!
(Mr. Bump stands on a cannon to gain high ground)
Narrator: It takes a brave and haughty soul to stand up to these fearsome scallywags!
(Little Miss Naughty and Little Miss Scary move in on Mr. Bump and point their swords at him. Mr. Bump gets scared and tries to avoid the swords)
Mr. Bump: (Chuckles nervously)
(Mr. Bump falls overboard because he lost his balance while standing on the cannon)
Mr. Bump: (screams)
(Mr. Happy comes out of his hiding spot and raises his hands in the air as if he was surrendering)
Narrator: Either that...
(A net ensnares Little Miss Naughty and Little Miss Scary)
Narrator: ...or a very crafty booby trap!
(The scene transitions to Mr. Quiet and Mr. Happy on a dock. Mr. Bump pulls himself out of the water and all three salute)
Narrator: But whether you're a brave and noble captain...
(Little Miss Naughty and Little Miss Scary are shown trapped in the net)
Narrator: ...or an evil pirate...
(Mr. Nervous is shown further up the dock looking at a pelican)
Narrator: ...there's a good deal to know about sailing a ship.
Pelican: (squawks)
Mr. Nervous: (screams)
(Mr. Nervous runs further down the dock and meets up with Mr. Messy, Mr. Fussy, and Little Miss Sunshine)
Narrator: Which is why Miss Bossy's sailing lessons are so popular.
(Mr. Messy takes a bite out of his tuna sandwich and some of it squirts onto Mr. Fussy's face. Mr. Fussy looks at Mr. Fussy in anger)
Mr. Messy: Sorry about that, Mr. Fussy! That tuna practically jumped out of the sandwich!
(Mr. Fussy takes out a rag and wipes the tuna off his face)
Mr. Fussy: Normally, I would be revolted Mr. Messy. But I'm just too excited for this sailing lesson to let a little...tuna ruin my day. I've always wanted to learn to sail!
Miss Sunshine: Me too! I also want to learn how to fly, but I decided to put that off until I grow a set of wings.
Mr. Nervous: (whimpers) I didn't know we could sprout wings! Oh great! One more thing to worry about!
Miss Bossy (offscreen): Watch out!
(Little Miss Bossy uses a rope to swing onto the dock. Mr. Nervous jumps into the water to avoid getting hit)
Miss Bossy: Coming through!
(Little Miss Bossy lands on the dock. Little Miss Bossy is holding a treasure chest. Mr. Nervous climbs back onto the dock)
Miss Bossy: Hey everybody! I'm Miss Bossy! Welcome to Pirate Lesson!
Mr. Fussy: Uh...Pirate Lesson!? But this is supposed to be a sailing lesson!
(Mr. Fussy takes out a brochure)
Mr. Fussy: It says so here in the brochure.
Miss Bossy: I'm the teacher! And I'll teach what I want!
(Little Miss Bossy puts on pirate clothes)
Miss Bossy: And today, we're learning how to be a pirate! Who wants to volunteer? You! Mr. Nervous! Get up here!
Mr. Nervous: Oh no! N-n-no! No! Please! Not me! I'm not meant for this sort of thing!
Miss Bossy: Come on, Mr. Nervous! We don't have all day!
(Mr. Nervous reluctantly walks over to Little Miss Bossy)
Miss Bossy: The first thing to know about being a pirate...
(Little Miss Bossy opens the treasure chest and takes out pirate clothes. Little Miss Bossy grabs Mr. Nervous and wraps a bandana around his head)
Miss Bossy: Is how to dress like a pirate!
(A parrot flies over and lands on Mr. Nervous' shoulder)
Parrot: (squawks)
Mr. Fussy: Oh. I'm sorry, Miss Bossy! But this is not the lesson I thought it was!
(Mr. Fussy starts walking away)
Mr. Fussy: If, you will excuse me...
Miss Bossy (offscreen): GET BACK HERE!
(Mr. Fussy stops walking)
Miss Bossy: You three have to be my prisoners! Stand over there!
Miss Sunshine: Yes! I get to be tied up!
(Little Miss Sunshine runs over to Little Miss Bossy)
Mr. Messy: Hey, Mr. Fussy! Would you mind holding onto the rest of me sandwich?
Mr. Fussy: Uh!
(Mr. Messy gives Mr. Fussy his sandwich)
Mr. Messy: Me pockets are a bit full!
(Mr. Messy walks over to Little Miss Bossy)
Mr. Fussy: Of course they are.
(Mr. Fussy walks over to Little Miss Bossy)
Miss Bossy: You're all gonna learn how to fight like a pirate!
(Little Miss Bossy pushes Mr. Nervous towards Mr. Messy. Little Miss Bossy digs through the treasure chest and pulls two deflated balloon swords and an air pump)
Miss Bossy: Starting with the sword fight!
(Little Miss Bossy inflates the balloon swords)
Mr. Nervous: (stammers) Fight...fight...sword!? Well...
(Little Miss Bossy hands one sword to Mr. Nervous and the other to Mr. Messy)
Miss Bossy: Take these swords and go to it!
(Mr. Nervous touches the top of the sword)
Mr. Messy: En Garde, Mr. Nervous!
(Mr. Messy starts sword fighting with Mr. Nervous)
Mr. Nervous: (screams)! En Garde yourself!
Messy: She! Zam! Ze!
(Mr. Nervous' balloon sword deflates)
Mr. Messy: Aw.
Mr. Nervous: Ah!
Miss Bossy: Next, taking prisoner!
Mr. Fussy: Oh! I don't think so!
(Little Miss Bossy lassos Mr. Fussy, Mr. Messy, and Little Miss Sunshine)
Miss Bossy (offscreen): Where do you think you're going?!
Miss Sunshine: Would it be alright if, as a prisoner, I screamed? I'm really good at sounding scared!
Miss Bossy: Yes, but don't scream until I tell you!
Miss Sunshine: Goody! I'll be right here waiting!
(Mr. Nervous starts wrapping up Mr. Messy, Mr. Fussy, and Little Miss Sunshine to make sure that they won't escape)
Miss Bossy: Now wrap it round a few more times! The most important part of taking prisoners is making sure they're well tied up!
(Mr. Fussy notices something)
Mr. Fussy: (gags) What is that horrible smell?
Mr. Messy: Wha-?
(Mr. Messy thinks for a moment before figuring out the answer)
Mr. Messy: Oh! I think it's some green cheese I've got in me pocket!
(Mr. Messy takes out the green cheese)
Miss Sunshine: Oh!
(Little Miss Sunshine holds her nose in disgust)
Mr. Messy: You know...in case of emergency.
Miss Sunshine: Ew!
Mr. Fussy: (Coughs)
Little Miss Bossy: Miss Sunshine...start screaming!
Miss Sunshine: (screaming)
Mr. Nervous: N-n-n-n-no!
(Little Miss Sunshine continues screaming as she winks at Little Miss Bossy)
Mr. Nervous (offscreen): Please don't scream!
Miss Sunshine: (screaming)
(Mr. Nervous, overwhelmed by everything, passes out)
Miss Bossy: Hey! I didn't say you could do that!
(A foghorn is heard in the distance)
Miss Bossy: Lucky for you, the lesson is over.
(Little Miss Bossy gives a loud whistle. A pirate ship sails by and Little Miss Bossy boards it)
Miss Bossy: Next week, we're gonna learn how to bury treasure! So be here on time!
(The ship sails away)
Miss Sunshine: Mr. Nervous! We need you to untie us!
(Mr. Nervous doesn't wake up)
Miss Sunshine: Mr. Nervous?
Mr. Nervous: (murmurs while unconscious) Pesky pirates with...
Mr. Messy: How long do you think he's gonna be like that?
Mr. Fussy: Probably...hours. We'll all go hungry!
Mr. Messy: Woo! Good thing we have that tuna sandwich in your pocket.
(Mr. Messy takes the tuna sandwich out of Mr. Fussy's pocket)
Mr. Fussy: Oh! No!!
(Mr. Fussy tries to run away but cannot due to being tied up)
Mr. Fussy: (sobs)
(The scene transitions to the first bumper. Mr. Nosey and Mr. Small are dressed as pirates looking for buried treasure. Mr. Small has the map and Mr. Nosey has the shovel. They find the X that marks the spot and Mr. Nosey starts digging. But Mr. Nosey accidentally tosses the sand onto Mr. Small. Burying Mr. Small in a mound of sand. The next scene is at "Miss Scary's Pirate Restaurant." Mr. Grumpy, Little Miss Chatterbox, and Mr. Quiet are all there to give it a try)
Narrator: Pirates are much talked about in Dillydale. So much so, that Miss Scary decided to open her very own pirate-themed restaurant.
Mr. Grumpy: Humph!
Miss Chatterbox: (giggles) I've been wanting to try this restaurant for a really long time. Well, not that long. Since I only heard about it yesterday, actually. But from yesterday to today is a really long time to wait when you want to go somewhere. I think this pirate restaurant is really fantastic!
Mr. Grumpy: Well, I think it's rubbish! And I'm sure Quiet agrees with me. Don't you Mr. Quiet?
Mr. Quiet: Uh...I kind of like it.
Mr. Grumpy: See? He hates it as well.
(Little Miss Scary shows up dressed like a pirate by swinging on a rope)
Miss Scary: Arrgh!
(Little Miss Scary knocks Mr. Quiet out of his chair)
Mr. Quiet: Oh!
Miss Scary: Welcome To Miss Scary's Pirate Restaurant!
(Mr. Quiet sits back down in his chair and Little Miss Scary places three menus on the table)
Miss Scary: Here are some menus to get you started. If ye dare! Ha-ha!
(Little Miss Scary walks away)
Mr. Grumpy: Oh brother!
(Little Miss Scary swings by on a rope)
Miss Chatterbox: Oh!
Miss Scary: I'll be back with some water.
(Little Miss Scary crashes into the wall as she swings backwards. Mr. Grumpy, Mr. Quiet and Little Miss Chatterbox cringe at the sound)
Mr. Grumpy: (growls)
(Little Miss Chatterbox grabs one of the menus)
Miss Chatterbox: Oh! This menu is so unusual! There are so many things I've never heard of before! Like this Landlubber Stew! I don't think I've ever tasted Landlubber before!
(A rope falls from the ceiling and Little Miss Scary slides down it holding a tray carrying three glasses of water)
Miss Scary: A-ha!
(Little Miss Scary swaps the menus on the table with the glasses of water)
Miss Scary: Here be yer water!
Mr. Grumpy: About time!
(Mr. Grumpy drinks some water)
Mr. Grumpy: (gags)
(Mr. Grumpy makes a disgusted face and spit the water out of his mouth and all over Mr. Quiet)
Mr. Quiet: Oh!
Mr. Grumpy: That’s saltwater!!
Miss Scary: Aye, matey!
Mr. Quiet: Ugh!
Miss Scary: Only saltwater to drink for the a lot of ya! Ha-ha!
(Little Miss Scary runs away and returns with three bowls of stew)
Miss Scary: Ah! Here's some Landlubber Stew!
(The stews crash on the table and stew splashes on Mr. Grumpy, Little Miss Chatterbox, and Mr. Quiet)
Mr. Grumpy: (gasps)
Miss Scary: Would ya like pepper with that?
(Little Miss Scary takes off her peg leg and reveals that its a pepper grinder. The leg that was where the peg leg was pops back out)
Mr. Grumpy: Yes. Gotta give it some taste.
(Little Miss Scary grinds some pepper onto Mr. Grumpy's stew)
Miss Chatterbox: Yes, please!
(Little Miss Scary grinds some pepper onto Little Miss Chatterbox's stew)
Mr. Quiet: Uh, no pepper for me, thanks.
(Little Miss Scary grinds some pepper onto Mr. Quiet's stew anyway. Much to his annoyance. Little Miss Scary then places the pepper grinder back over her leg)
Miss Scary: Enjoy your meal! It may be your last!
(The rope drops down from the ceiling and Little Miss Scary grabs)
Miss Scary: (cackles)
(The rope pulls Little Miss Scary back up and offscreen)
Mr. Grumpy: Humph! Dodo bird.
(Little Miss Chatterbox tries the Landlubber Stew)
Miss Chatterbox: Mmm! This Landlubber Stew is delicious!
(Mr. Grumpy has a lump of stew on his spoon)
Mr. Grumpy: Yeah, if you like warm mud!
(Mr. Grumpy plops the spoonful of stew back into the bowl)
Miss Chatterbox: (chuckles) It tastes familiar but I can't put my finger on it!
(A clam pops out of Mr. Quiet's stew)
Mr. Quiet: (gasps)
(The clam spits stew in Mr. Quiet's face)
Mr. Quiet: Hmmm...clam.
(The table is pulled away, a backdrop of a sky falls down and Mr. Grumpy, Little Miss Chatterbox, and Mr. Quiet are placed onto a pirate ship set. More specifically, a plank suspended over a kiddie pool)
Miss Chatterbox: (gasps)
Miss Scary: Time for you three to walk the plank!
Mr. Grumpy: For noodles sake, what kind of a restaurant are you running here?
Miss Scary: A pirate restaurant. What did you think? Now walk the plank!
Mr. Grumpy: Humph!
Miss Scary: Or else!
Mr. Grumpy: The only place I’m walking is out that door.
(Mr. Grumpy starts leaving)
Miss Scary: Oh no you don't, matey!
(Little Miss Scary nabs Mr. Grumpy in a net)
Mr. Grumpy: Wah! Oh, caught by a scary nuisance!
(Little Miss Scary tosses Mr. Grumpy back onto the plank)
Miss Scary: Give me a beat!
Mr. Grumpy: Humph!
Miss Scary: It's time to walk the plank!
(Little Miss Scary plays the accordion)
Miss Scary: (snorts and laughs) 🎵 Hop two times on your left foot and two times on your right! 🎵
(Little Miss Chatterbox and Mr. Quiet start dancing and end up causing Mr. Grumpy to fall off the plank)
Miss Scary (offscreen): 🎵 Try not to fall off the gang plank🎵
Miss Chatterbox and Mr. Quiet: (giggling)
Mr. Grumpy: (screams)
Miss Scary: 🎵 But scream with all your might!🎵 (shrieks)
Miss Chatterbox: Ah! (giggles) I love this dance! Actually, I like all kinds of dances. Unless it is because there are ants in my pants...
(Mr. Grumpy looks up and watches Little Miss Chatterbox, Little Miss Scary, and Mr. Quiet dance)
Mr. Grumpy: Oh, crooked cucumbers. Humph!
(Mr. Grumpy crosses his arms in frustration. The scene fades to the next bumper)
(Mr. Nosey is shown digging for the treasure he and Mr. Small are searching for. He starts digging in front of Mr. Small. When he resurfaces, Mr. Nosey, pops up behind Mr. Small. The two share a smile and look at the camera as the next scene begins)
(Little Miss Scary and Little Miss Naughty are shown dressed as pirates sailing on the ocean)
Narrator: It's one thing to run into pirates out on the open sea.
Parrot: (squawks)
(The scene cuts into outer space where a space pirate ship is stalking a smaller ship)
Narrator: But it's quite another to run into them in space. For you see, a pirate is a pirate no matter where they are.
(The scene shifts into the smaller ship with Mr. Happy, Mr. Rude, and Mr. Tickle as the crew)
Miss Giggles (offscreen): This is ground control!
(Little Miss Giggles is shown on the computer screen)
Miss Giggles: (giggles) Come in Jupiter 9.
Mr. Happy: Hello, Miss Giggles! Wonderful to hear from you!
Miss Giggles: I have some very important news!
Mr. Happy: Yes...what is it?
Miss Giggles: (giggles)
(Mr. Happy, Mr. Tickle, and Mr. Rude give Little Miss Giggles looks of confusion)
Mr. Rude: She is as soft as a grape!
Miss Giggles: I'm supposed to tell you...(giggles)...to look out for...(giggles)...Alien Space Pirates! (laughs)
(Little Miss Giggles falls to the floor and Mr. Rude turns off the screen)
Mr. Rude: That's enough of her!
(The ship suddenly shakes as something is heard ramming into the ship)
Mr. Tickle: Oh, no!
(Mr. Happy, Mr. Tickle, and Mr. Rude walk over to the control panel and a space pirate ship is flashing on one of the screens)
Mr. Tickle: Somebody's coming aboard our ship!
Mr. Happy: Maybe it's those space pirates Miss Giggles warned us about!
(The door is heard opening)
Alien Captain (offscreen): Arrgh!
(Three alien space pirates are shown in the doorway)
Alien Captain: (alien dialect)
Mr. Happy: How wonderful to meet you! I'm Mr. Happy, captain of the ship!
(The alien captain pokes at Mr. Happy with their tentacle)
Mr. Happy: (whimpers)
(Mr. Tickle moves Mr. Rude in front of him in fear)
Alien Captain: (alien dialect)
Mr. Happy: I don't think they're friendly!
Mr. Tickle: Maybe they need a tickle?
(Mr. Rude facepalms himself in annoyance and musters up some courage)
Mr. Rude: Or maybe...they need a taste of my laser beam!
(Mr. Rude walks up to the aliens while Mr. Happy tries to stop him)
Mr. Happy: Don't make them angry, Mr. Rude!
(Mr. Rude takes out his laser beam)
Mr. Happy: Honestly, we come in peace!
(Mr. Rude starts poking the alien captain with his laser beam. Then, the alien space pirates each take out their own laser beams)
Mr. Happy: Ooh!
Mr. Rude: (gulps) Oh boy.
(Mr. Rude runs to the control panel and tries to contact ground control)
Mr. Rude: Come in, ground control! Help! We are being attacked by space pirates!
[The space pirates chase Mr. Rude as he runs away from the control panel. Mr. Happy chases after them with the hopes of making peace)
Mr. Happy: Well...well...perhaps I can offer you some refreshments. (chuckles nervously)
(The aliens point their weapons at Mr. Happy)
Mr. Happy: Uh...how about a delicious box of fruit-filled space fizz?
(He takes of a box of space fizz for the aliens. The alien space pirates look at each other for a moment. The alien captain takes out a translator-like megaphone and speaks through it)
Alien Captain: Give us your treasures!
(Mr. Tickle runs over to Mr. Happy)
Mr. Tickle: Would you settle for just a tickle?
(The Alien Captain shoots Mr. Tickle with his space gun. Encasing Mr. Tickle in goo)
Mr. Happy: Uh-hu! Woah!
(The Alien Captain is shown holding his space gun)
Mr. Happy (offscreen): That's a great weapon! Heh!
(Mr. Happy is shown next to the goo encased Mr. Tickle)
Mr. Happy: Uh...maybe you could show me how you...
(The Alien Captain shoots Mr. Happy with his space gun. Encasing Mr. Happy himself in goo)
Mr. Happy: Make this wonderful goo?
Mr. Rude: Take anything you want. Just don't shoot you goo at me!
Alien Captain: You must walk the plank!
(The other two aliens push Mr. Happy and Mr. Tickle to the door)
Mr. Tickle: But we'll fall into space and be lost forever!
(Mr. Rude walks to the door and the Alien Captain pokes at Mr. Rude with his space gun to make sure he keeps moving)
Mr. Rude: Careful where you point that thing!
(Mr. Rude joins Mr. Happy and Mr. Tickle at the door and the three alien space pirates point their space guns at them)
Mr. Tickle: Are you sure a good tickle wouldn't solve everything?
Mr. Rude: I refuse to go!
Mr. Happy: Don't disagree with them, Mr. Rude. We don't want a bunch of angry aliens on our hands!
Mr. Rude: I'll give you angry aliens! [farts and laughs]
(Cut to Little Miss Daredevil after landing on the moon)
Miss Daredevil: Mr. Rude!!!
(The scene cuts back to the alien space pirates. They are disgusted by the smell)
Alien Pirate: (gags)
(The alien space pirates are shown retreating on their ship. The scene cuts back to Mr. Happy, Mr. Tickle, and Mr. Rude aboard their ship. Mr. Happy and Mr. Tickle are shown freed from the goo with a few gooey pieces left on them)
Mr. Happy: Good work, Mr. Rude! If it wasn't for you, we all might have been space junk!
Mr. Rude: I do what I can.
Mr. Tickle: And for that...you deserve a tickle!
(Mr. Tickle tickles Mr. Rude)
Mr. Rude: No!
Mr. Tickle and Mr. Rude: (laughs)
Mr. Rude: Stop! Stop! Stop that! (laughs)
(A shot of the ship from space is shown)
Mr. Rude (offscreen): (Laughs)
(The screen fades to black. The scene fades to the next bumper. Mr. Nosey is shown struggling to get the treasure chest of the hole. Mr. Nosey manages to get the treasure chest out of the hole but he loses his balance and falls into the hole. He also accidentally drops the chest onto Mr. Small in the process. Mr. Small opens the treasure chest from the inside as Mr. Nosey pops out of the hole. It turns out that there was only one gold coil in the chest. The two are confused but they quickly brush it off)
(The episode starts to wrap up by showing some previous happenings from the episode. Starting with Mr. Bump pulling himself onto the dock between Mr. Quiet and Mr. Happy)
Narrator: And so, while pirates may come in a variety of shapes and sizes...
(Little Miss Bossy swings down onto the dock in front of the tied-up Mr. Fussy, Mr. Messy, and Little Miss Sunshine)
Miss Bossy: A-ha!
Miss Sunshine: (screaming)
Narrator: One thing is certain...
(Little Miss Scary plays the accordion by Little Miss Chatterbox and a captured Mr. Grumpy)
Mr. Grumpy: (grunting)
Narrator: They are a mischievous lot!
(A cannonball is fired from a pirate ship to the camera. It transitions the scene to Mr. Nosey and Mr. Small (both still dressed as pirates) running away from the dreaded pirate, Little Miss Naughty)
Narrator: So the next time you're on the high seas, do keep a lookout for these naughty pirates!
Miss Naughty: (laughing mischievously)
(Mr. Nervous (still dressed as a pirate) is shown hiding in a treasure chest)
Narrator: Oh! And remember to find a safe place for all your treasure!
Mr. Nervous: Oh!
(Mr. Nervous closes the chest from the inside and the screen fades to black)
(Episode ends here)
Deleted Scene[]
US Dub[]
Mr. Men and Little Miss: The Mr. Men, The Mr. Men, The Mr. Men, The Mr. Men!
(Scene swaps to Mr. Tickle tickling lots of Mr. Men and Little Misses and goes all the way to Mr. Bump and Miss Whoops on a plane and tickles Miss Whoops causing Mr. Bump to fall into the "O" in the logo)
Mr. Bump: The Mr. Men Show!
(A big brown screen comes up with "Pirates" written on it, Little Miss Bossy dressed like a pirate, two anchors, and who created the episode underneath)
Miss Scary (voiceover): Aye matey!
(A cannon ball being fired and a splashing sound are heard)
Miss Scary (voiceover): Arrgh!
(The episode begins with a seagull landing on a pier and Mr. Small and Mr. Nosey on a canoe trying to get away from a shark)
Narrator: For as long as their have been kind hearted Mr. Men and Little Misses...
(The scene cuts to Mr. Happy and Mr. Bump sailing on an old school ship)
Narrator: Sailing upon the Dillydale seas,
(Through a telescope, we see Mr. Quiet also looking through a telescope. As both telescopes look at each other, we see that the first telescope was being looked through by Little Miss Naughty. Little Miss Naughty is on another ship wearing in pirate clothes)
Narrator: There have also been...
(Little Miss Naughty takes out a sword)
Narrator: Pirates!
(Little Miss Naughty and Little Miss Scary (who is also dressed like a pirate) swing on the ropes from their ship and board Mr. Happy's ship. Mr. Bump is the first to take notice)
Narrator: Pirates, who are always up to no good!
(Mr. Bump takes out his sword and prepares to duel the two pirate lassies. Mr. Bump stands on a cannon to gain high ground)
Narrator: It takes a brave and hardy soul to stand up to these fearsome scallywags!
(Little Miss Naughty and Little Miss Scary move in on Mr. Bump and point their swords at him. Mr. Bump gets scared and tries to avoid the swords only to fall overboard because he lost his balance while standing on the cannon. Mr. Happy comes out of his hiding spot and raises his hands in the air as if he was surrendering)
Narrator: Either that...
(A net ensnares Little Miss Naughty and Little Miss Scary)
Narrator: Or a very crafty booby trap!
(The scene transitions to Mr. Quiet and Mr. Happy on a dock. Mr. Bump pulls himself out of the water and all three salute)
Narrator: But whether you're a brave and noble captain...
(Little Miss Naughty and Little Miss Scary are shown trapped in the net very angry)
Narrator: Or an evil pirate...
(Mr. Nervous is shown further up the dock looking at a pelican)
Narrator: There's a good deal to know about sailing a ship.
Pelican: (squawks)
Mr. Nervous: (screams)
(Mr. Nervous runs further down the dock and meets up with Mr. Messy, Mr. Fussy, and Little Miss Sunshine)
Narrator: Which is why Miss Bossy's class is so popular.
(Mr. Messy takes a bite out of his tuna sandwich and some of it squirts onto Mr. Fussy's face. Mr. Fussy looks at Mr. Fussy in anger)
Mr. Messy: Sorry about that, Mr. Fussy! That tuna practically jumped out of the sandwich!
(Mr. Fussy takes out a rag and wipes the tuna off his face)
Mr. Fussy: Normally, I would be revolted Mr. Messy. But I'm just too excited for this sailing class to let a little...tuna ruin my day. I've always wanted to learn to sail!
Miss Sunshine: Me too! I also want to learn how to fly, but I decided to put that off until I grow a set of wings.
Mr. Nervous: Ghee! I didn't know we could sprout wings! Oh great! One more thing to worry about!
Miss Bossy (offscreen): Watch out!
(Little Miss Bossy uses a rope to swing onto the dock. Mr. Nervous jumps into the water to avoid getting hit)
Miss Bossy: Coming through!
(Little Miss Bossy lands on the dock. Little Miss Bossy is holding a treasure chest. Mr. Nervous climbs back onto the dock)
Miss Bossy: Hey everybody! I'm Miss Bossy! Welcome to Pirate Class!
Mr. Fussy: Uh...Pirate Class!? But this is supposed to be sailing class!
(Mr. Fussy takes out a brochure)
Mr. Fussy: It says so here in the brochure.
Miss Bossy: I'm the teacher! And I'll teach what I want!
(Little Miss Bossy puts on pirate clothes)
Miss Bossy: And today, we're learning how to be a pirate! Who wants to volunteer? You! Mr. Nervous! Get up here!
Mr. Nervous: No! N-n-no! No! Not me! I'm not meant for this sort of thing!
Miss Bossy: Come on, Mr. Nervous! We don't have all day!
(Mr. Nervous reluctantly walks over to Little Miss Bossy)
Miss Bossy: The first thing to know about being a pirate...
(Little Miss Bossy opens the treasure chest and takes out pirate clothes. Little Miss Bossy grabs Mr. Nervous and wraps a bandana around his head)
Miss Bossy: Is how to dress like a pirate!
(A parrot flies over and lands on Mr. Nervous' shoulder)
Parrot: (squawks)
Mr. Fussy: Oh. I'm sorry, Miss Bossy! But this is not the class I thought it was!
(Mr. Fussy starts walking away)
Mr. Fussy: If, you will excuse me...
Miss Bossy (offscreen): GET BACK HERE!
(Mr. Fussy stops walking)
Miss Bossy: You three have to be my prisoners! Stand over there!
Miss Sunshine: Yay! We get to play too!
(Little Miss Sunshine runs over to Little Miss Bossy)
Mr. Messy: Hey, Mr. Fussy! Would you mind holding onto the rest of my sandwich?
(Mr. Messy gives Mr. Fussy his sandwich)
Mr. Messy: My pockets are kinda full!
(Mr. Messy walks over to Little Miss Bossy)
Mr. Fussy: Of course they are.
(Mr. Fussy walks over to Little Miss Bossy)
Miss Bossy: You're all gonna learn how to fight like a pirate!
(Little Miss Bossy pushes Mr. Nervous towards Mr. Messy. Little Miss Bossy digs through the treasure chest and pulls two deflated balloon swords and an air pump)
Miss Bossy: Starting with the sword fight!
(Little Miss Bossy inflates the balloon swords)
Mr. Nervous: (stammers) Fight...fight...s-sword!? W...well...
(Little Miss Bossy hands one sword to Mr. Nervous and the other to Mr. Messy)
Miss Bossy: Take these swords and go at it!
(Mr. Nervous touches the top of the sword)
Mr. Messy: En Garde, Mr. Nervous!
(Mr. Messy starts sword fighting with Mr. Nervous)
Mr. Nervous: Gah! En Garde yourself!
Messy: Eh! Ah-ha! Ha!
(Mr. Nervous' balloon sword deflates)
Mr. Nervous: Gah!
Miss Bossy: Next up...taking prisoner!
Mr. Fussy: Oh! I don't think so!
(Little Miss Bossy lassos Mr. Fussy, Mr. Messy, and Little Miss Sunshine)
Miss Bossy (offscreen): Where do you think you're going?!
Miss Sunshine: Would it be okay if, as a prisoner, I screamed? I'm really good at sounding scared!
Miss Bossy: Yeah, but don't scream until I tell you!
Miss Sunshine: Goody! I'll be right here waiting!
(Mr. Nervous starts wrapping up Mr. Messy, Mr. Fussy, and Little Miss Sunshine to make sure that they won't escape)
Miss Bossy: Now wrap them up a few more times! The most important part of taking prisoners is making sure they're tied up good!
(Mr. Fussy notices something)
Mr. Fussy: Oh! What is that horrible smell?
Mr. Messy: Oh! I think it's some green cheese I have in my pocket!
(Mr. Messy takes out the green cheese. Little Miss Sunshine holds her nose in disgust)
Mr. Messy: You know...in case of emergency.
Mr. Fussy: (Coughs)
Little Miss Bossy: Miss Sunshine...start screaming!
Miss Sunshine: (screaming)
Mr. Nervous: N-n-n-no! No! No!
(Little Miss Sunshine continues screaming as she winks at Little Miss Bossy)
Miss Sunshine: (screaming) Help me!
(Mr. Nervous, overwhelmed by everything, passes out)
Miss Bossy: Hey! I didn't say you could do that!
(A foghorn is heard in the distance)
Miss Bossy: Lucky for you, class is over.
(Little Miss Bossy gives a loud whistle. A pirate ship sails by and Little Miss Bossy boards it)
Miss Bossy: Next week, we're gonna learn how to bury treasure. So be here on time!
(The ship sails away)
Miss Sunshine: Mr. Nervous! We need you to untie us!
(Mr. Nervous doesn't wake up)
Miss Sunshine: Mr. Nervous?
Mr. Nervous: (murmurs while unconscious) P...pirates.
Mr. Messy: How long do you think he's gonna be like that?
Mr. Fussy: Probably...hours. We'll all go hungry!
Mr. Messy: Woo! Good thing we have that tuna sandwich in your pocket.
(Mr. Messy takes the tuna sandwich out of Mr. Fussy's pocket)
Mr. Fussy: Doh! Oh!
(Mr. Fussy tries to run away but cannot due to being tied up. The scene transitions to the first bumper. Mr. Nosey and Mr. Small are dressed as pirates looking for buried treasure. Mr. Small has the map and Mr. Nosey has the shovel. They find the X that marks the spot and Mr. Nosey starts digging. But Mr. Nosey accidentally tosses the sand onto Mr. Small. Burying Mr. Small in a mound of sand. After the screen fades to the transition shot, a commercial for Mr. Nervous's Pirate-Be-Gone begins)
Mr. Nervous: Are you afraid of pirates. Oh! I know I am! That's why I invented, "Pirate-Be-Gone!" I'm Mr. Nervous. Here to tell you about the first pirate repellent in a can! One spritz will do the trick! Watch!
(Little Miss Naughty is shown dressed as a pirate threatening Mr. Quiet by pointing a sword at him)
Miss Naughty: Give me your treasures! Or else!
(Mr. Nervous pops out of a barrel and gives Mr. Quiet a can of Pirate-Be-Gone. Mr. Quiet uses it and it sprays some sort of silly string that ties up Little Miss Naughty. She hops away frustrated)
Miss Naughty: Arrgh!
Mr. Quiet: Thank you Pirate-Be-Gone!
(Little Miss Naughty is then shown threatening Mr. Lazy to walk the plank)
Mr. Nervous: For those time when you can't reach for a can, I've invented the Pirate-Be-Gone Captain's Hat!
(Mr. Nervous swaps Mr. Lazy's newsboy hat for the Pirate-Be-Gone Captain's Hat. He presses the button for Mr. Lazy and the silly string like substance ties up Little Miss Naughty again. She hops away frustrated)
Miss Naughty: Curse you and your hat!
Mr. Lazy: Thank you Pirate-Be-Gone.
(Mr. Happy, Little Miss Sunshine, and Little Miss Chatterbox are shown chained upside down)
Mr. Nervous (voiceover): Of course, not everyone can wear a captain's hat! That's why I've invented! The Pirate-Be-Gone Booby Trap Booty Bag!
(Little Miss Naughty opens the bag and gets tied up in the silly string like substance)
Mr. Happy: Thank you Pirate-Be-Gone.
Mr. Nervous: So call now and I'll give you the Pirate-Be-Gone Spray, Captain's Hat, and Booby Trap Booty Bag, all for one low price! That's Mr. Nervous' Pirate-Be-Gone! Don't leave port without it!
(The commercial ends The next scene is at "Miss Scary's Pirate Restaurant." Mr. Grumpy, Little Miss Chatterbox, and Mr. Quiet are all there to give it a try)
Narrator: Pirates have become quite popular in Dillydale. So much so that Miss Scary decided to open her very own pirate-themed restaurant.
Miss Chatterbox: (giggles) I've been wanting to try this restaurant for a really long time. Well, not that long since I only heard about it yesterday actually. But from yesterday to today is a really long time to wait when you want to go some place. I think this pirate restaurant is totally great.
Mr. Grumpy: Well I think it stinks. And I'm sure Quiet agrees with me. Don't you Mr. Quiet?
Mr. Quiet: Uh...I kind of like it
Mr. Grumpy: See? He hates it too!
(Little Miss Scary shows up dressed like a pirate by swinging on a rope)
Miss Scary: Arrgh!
(Little Miss Scary knocks Mr. Quiet out of his chair)
Miss Scary: Welcome To Miss Scary's Pirate Restaurant!
(Mr. Quiet sits back down in his chair and Little Miss Scary places three menus on the table)
Miss Scary: Here are some menus to get you started. If ye dare! Arrgh!
(Little Miss Scary walks away)
Mr. Grumpy: Humph!
(Little Miss Scary swings by on a rope)
Miss Scary: I'll be back with some water.
(Little Miss Scary crashes into the wall as she swings backwards. Mr. Grumpy, Mr. Quiet and Little Miss Chatterbox cringe at the sound. Little Miss Chatterbox grabs one of the menus)
Miss Chatterbox: Oh! This menu is so unusual! There are so many things I've never heard of before! (giggles) Like this Landlubber Stew! I don't think I've ever tasted Landlubber before!
(A rope falls from the ceiling and Little Miss Scary slides down it holding a tray carrying three glasses of water)
Miss Scary: Arrgh!
(Little Miss Scary swaps the menus on the table with the glasses of water)
Miss Scary: Here's yer water!
Mr. Grumpy: 'Bout time!
(Mr. Grumpy drinks some water. He makes a disgusted face and spit the water out of his mouth and all over Mr. Quiet)
Mr. Grumpy: THAT'S SALTWATER!!
Miss Scary: Aye matey! Only saltwater to drink for the a lot of ya! Ha-ha!
(Little Miss Scary runs away and returns with three bowls of stew)
Miss Scary: Arrgh! Here's some Landlubber Stew!
(The stews crash on the table and stew splashes on Mr. Grumpy, Little Miss Chatterbox, and Mr. Quiet)
Miss Scary: Would ya like pepper with that?
(Little Miss Scary takes off her peg leg and reveals that its a pepper grinder. The leg that was where the peg leg was pops back out)
Mr. Grumpy: Yeah. Gotta give it some taste.
(Little Miss Scary grinds some pepper onto Mr. Grumpy's stew)
Miss Chatterbox: Yes, please!
(Little Miss Scary grinds some pepper onto Little Miss Chatterbox's stew)
Mr. Quiet: Uh, no pepper for me, thank you.
(Little Miss Scary grinds some pepper onto Mr. Quiet's stew anyway. Much to his annoyance. Little Miss Scary then places the pepper grinder back over her leg)
Miss Scary: Enjoy yer meal! It may be your last!
(The rope drops down from the ceiling and Little Miss Scary grabs)
Miss Scary: (snorts and cackles)
(The rope pulls Little Miss Scary back up and offscreen)
Mr. Grumpy: Humph! Dodo bird.
(Little Miss Chatterbox tries the Landlubber Stew)
Miss Chatterbox: Mmm! This Landlubber Stew is delicious!
(Mr. Grumpy has a lump of stew on his spoon)
Mr. Grumpy: Yeah, if you like warm mud!
(Mr. Grumpy plops the spoonful of stew back into the bowl)
Miss Chatterbox: (chuckles) I can't figure out what that taste is!
(A clam pops out of Mr. Quiet's stew and spits stew in his face)
Mr. Quiet: Hmmm...clam.
(The table is pulled away, a backdrop of a sky falls down and Mr. Grumpy, Little Miss Chatterbox, and Mr. Quiet are placed onto a pirate ship set. More specifically, a plank suspended over a kiddie pool)
Miss Scary: Time for you three to walk the plank!
Mr. Grumpy: For noodles sake, what kind of a restaurant are you running here?
Miss Scary: A pirate restaurant. What did you think? Now walk the plank, or else!
Mr. Grumpy: The only place I’m walking is out that door.
(Mr. Grumpy starts leaving)
Miss Scary: Oh, no, you don't, matey!
(Little Miss Scary nabs Mr. Grumpy in a net)
Mr. Grumpy: Oh! Crooked cucumbers!
(Little Miss Scary tosses Mr. Grumpy back onto the plank)
Miss Scary: Give me a beat! It's time to walk the plank!
(Little Miss Scary plays the accordion)
Miss Scary: (laughs) 🎵 Hop two times on yer left foot and two times on yer right! 🎵
(Little Miss Chatterbox and Mr. Quiet start dancing and end up causing Mr. Grumpy to fall off the plank)
Miss Scary: 🎵 Try not to fall off the gang plank but scream in lots of fright!🎵 ARRGH!
Miss Chatterbox: Ah! (giggles) I love this dance! Actually I like all kinds of dances. Unless of course there are ants in my pants...
(Mr. Grumpy looks up and watches Little Miss Chatterbox, Little Miss Scary, and Mr. Quiet dance)
Mr. Grumpy: Oh, crooked cucumbers.
(Mr. Grumpy crosses his arms in frustration. The scene fades to the next bumper)
(Mr. Nosey is shown digging for the treasure he and Mr. Small are searching for. He starts digging in front of Mr. Small. When he resurfaces, Mr. Nosey, pops up behind Mr. Small. The two share a smile and look at the camera as the next scene begins)
(Little Miss Scary and Little Miss Naughty are shown dressed as pirates sailing on the ocean)
Narrator: It's one thing to run into pirates out on the open sea.
Parrot: (squawks)
(The scene cuts into outer space where a space pirate ship is stalking a smaller ship)
Narrator: It's quite another to run into them in space. For you see a pirate is a pirate no matter where they are.
(The scene shifts into the smaller ship with Mr. Happy, Mr. Rude, and Mr. Tickle as the crew)
Miss Giggles (offscreen): This is ground control!
(Little Miss Giggles is shown on the computer screen)
Miss Giggles: (giggles) Come in Jupiter 9.
Mr. Happy: Hello, Miss Giggles! Wonderful to hear from you!
Miss Giggles: I have some very important news!
Mr. Happy: Yes...what is it?
Miss Giggles: (giggles)
(Mr. Happy, Mr. Tickle, and Mr. Rude give Little Miss Giggles looks of confusion)
Mr. Rude: She...is as soft as a grape!
Miss Giggles: I'm supposed to tell you...(giggles)...to look out for...(giggles)...ALIEN SPACE PIRATES!! (laughs)
(Little Miss Giggles falls to the floor and Mr. Rude turns off the screen)
Mr. Rude: That's enough of her!
(The ship suddenly shakes as something is heard ramming into the ship)
Mr. Tickle: Oh no!
(Mr. Happy, Mr. Tickle, and Mr. Rude walk over to the control panel and a space pirate ship is flashing on one of the screens)
Mr. Tickle: Someone has come aboard our ship!
Mr. Happy: Maybe, it's those space pirates Miss Giggles warned us about!
(The door is heard opening)
Alien Captain (offscreen): Arrgh!
(Three alien space pirates are shown in the doorway)
Alien Captain: (alien dialect)
Mr. Happy: How...wonderful to meet you! I'm Mr. Happy, captain of the ship!
(The alien captain pokes at Mr. Happy with their tentacle. Mr. Tickle moves Mr. Rude in front of him in fear)
Alien Captain: (alien dialect)
Mr. Happy: I don't think they're friendly!
Mr. Tickle: Maybe they need a tickle?
(Mr. Rude facepalms himself in annoyance and musters up some courage)
Mr. Rude: Or maybe...they need a taste of my laser beam!
(Mr. Rude walks up to the aliens while Mr. Happy tries to stop him)
Mr. Happy: (whispering to Mr. Rude) Don't anger them Mr. Rude!
(Mr. Rude takes out his laser beam)
Mr. Happy: Honestly, we come in peace!
(Mr. Rude starts poking the alien captain with his laser beam. Then, the alien space pirates each take out their own laser beams)
Mr. Rude: (gulps) Oh boy.
(Mr. Rude runs to the control panel and tries to contact ground control)
Mr. Rude: Come in! Ground control, HELP!!! We are being attacked by space pirates!!!
(The space pirates chase Mr. Rude as he runs from the control panel. Mr. Happy chases after them with the hopes of making peace)
Mr. Happy: Well...well...perhaps I can offer you some refreshments.
(The aliens point their weapons at Mr. Happy)
Mr. Happy: Uh...how about a delicious box of fruit-filled space fizz?
(Mr. Happy takes of a box of space fizz for the aliens. The alien space pirates look at each other for a moment. The alien captain takes out a translator-like megaphone and speaks through it)
Alien Captain: Give us your treasures!
(Mr. Tickle runs over to Mr. Happy)
Mr. Tickle: Would you settle for just a tickle?
(The Alien Captain shoots Mr. Tickle with his space gun. Encasing Mr. Tickle in goo)
Mr. Happy: Woah!
(The Alien Captain is shown holding his space gun)
Mr. Happy (offscreen): That is some weapon!
(Mr. Happy is shown next to the goo encased Mr. Tickle)
Mr. Happy: Uh...maybe you could show me how you...
(The Alien Captain shoots Mr. Happy with his space gun. Encasing Mr. Happy in goo)
Mr. Happy: Make this wonderful goo?
Mr. Rude: Take anything you want. Just don't shoot you goo at me!
Alien Captain: You must walk the plank!
(The two other aliens push Mr. Happy and Mr. Tickle to the door)
Mr. Tickle: But will fall into space and be lost forever!
(Mr. Rude walks to the door and the Alien Captain pokes at Mr. Rude with his space gun to make sure he keeps moving)
Mr. Rude: Careful where you point that thing!
(Mr. Rude joins Mr. Happy and Mr. Tickle at the door and the three alien space pirates point their space guns at them)
Mr. Tickle: Are you sure a good tickle wouldn't solve everything?
Mr. Rude: I refuse to go!
Mr. Happy: Don't disagree with them, Mr. Rude. We don't want a bunch of angry aliens on our hands!
Mr. Rude: I'll give you angry aliens! [farts and laughs]
(Cut to Little Miss Daredevil after landing on the moon)
Miss Daredevil: MR. RUDE!!!
(The scene cuts back to the alien space pirates. They are disgusted by the smell)
Alien Pirate: (gags)
(The alien space pirates are shown retreating on their ship. The scene cuts back to Mr. Happy, Mr. Tickle, and Mr. Rude aboard their ship. Mr. Happy and Mr. Tickle are shown freed from the goo with a few gooey pieces left on them)
Mr. Happy: Good work, Mr. Rude! If it wasn't for you, we all might have been space junk!
Mr. Rude: I do what I can.
Mr. Tickle: And for that...you deserve a tickle!
(Mr. Tickle tickles Mr. Rude)
Mr. Rude: No! (laughs) Stop! Stop! Stop that! (laughs)
(A shot of the ship from space is shown)
Mr. Rude (offscreen): (Laughs)
(The screen fades to black. The scene fades to the next bumper. Mr. Nosey is shown struggling to get the treasure chest of the hole)
Mr. Nosey: (grunting)
(Mr. Nosey manages to get the treasure chest out of the hole but he loses his balance and falls into the hole. He also accidentally drops the chest onto Mr. Small in the process. Mr. Small opens the treasure chest from the inside as Mr. Nosey pops out of the hole. It turns out that there was only one gold coil in the chest. The two are confused but they quickly brush it off. The episode starts to wrap up by showing some previous happenings from the episode. Starting with Mr. Bump pulling himself onto the dock between Mr. Quiet and Mr. Happy)
Narrator: And so, while pirates may come in a variety of shapes and sizes...
(Little Miss Bossy swings down onto the dock in front of the tied-up Mr. Fussy, Mr. Messy, and Little Miss Sunshine)
Miss Bossy: (laughs)
Miss Sunshine: (screaming)
Narrator: One thing is certain...
(Little Miss Scary plays the accordion by Little Miss Chatterbox and a captured Mr. Grumpy)
Narrator: They are a mischievous lot!
(A cannonball is fired from a pirate ship to the camera. It transitions the scene to Mr. Nosey and Mr. Small (both still dressed as pirates) running away from the dreaded pirate, Little Miss Naughty)
Narrator: So the next time you're on the high seas, do keep a lookout for these naughty pirates!
(Mr. Nervous (still dressed as a pirate) is shown hiding in a treasure chest)
Narrator: And remember to find a safe place for all your treasure!
(Mr. Nervous closes the chest from the inside and the screen fades to black and the episode ends]